For Christ's Sake, Let us Dream

            It’s a terrifying thing to consider what it actually means to follow Christ. It seems every time I am faced with it, I stop just short of actually encountering it. I have begun to experience it I think. But there is always so much more to experience, to discover, to surrender. It is radical. It flies in the face of everything we have ever learned from our culture. It is directly opposed to our human nature.

            Do we really want to be transformed by Christ? Or do we simply want enough of Him to make our every day lives easier? How dedicated are we to the concept of not living for ourselves? To living for His glory alone? To changing the world? Sobering questions, aren’t they?

            But questions that must be answered. And I am afraid that I cannot answer that I am willing. My wonderfully wise boyfriend said the other day that in order for God to answer us, we must first be willing to hear the answer, to follow where He leads, to do what He asks. And so it gives me pause when I pray for things such as transformation, when I pray that I surrender my life, my day, my all to Him. Do I truly mean what I say? Am I willing to surrender the things closest to my heart? To accept the fact that I, in and of myself, am nothing? That every good thing within me is from Christ?

            It is a terrifying thing to consider what it actually means to follow Christ.

            Because when we are honest with ourselves, when we come face to face with the reality of a radically surrendered life, we must then ask ourselves one question.

            Is it worth it?

            That’s the question the rich young man was faced with. He saw what it would take to follow Jesus, and it was not worth it for him. He walked away. And for the first time it strikes me how unutterably tragic that is. Mostly because it happens every single day, even in my own life. No, Jesus. I don’t think you are worth more than my insecurity, than my fear, than my comfort. I would like to hang on to those things. I won’t step out of my comfort zone to follow you. I just want you to make me better. I don’t actually want to serve you.

            And yet even as I consider it, I am gripped with fear. As I consider saying yes, stepping out of the boat, I am terrified that I will sink. But the beautiful thing is, Peter did sink. And still Christ caught Him. Christ does not expect perfection. He does not wish to make us miserable. He simply loves us more than we could ever imagine, and asks that we trust that His plan is what will satisfy us. Gives us life. Life to the full.

            Look up from your earthly concerns, your earthly dreams, and see that Christ has more for you. See that what He has for you is worth it. See that it is terrifying, that you cannot do it on your own, but that relying on Him every day, every moment, will make your life worth living.

            And believe it is worth it. Believe leaving the world behind and stepping into light is worth it.

            May my dreams be expanded. I still believe writing is my dream. But no matter how big that dream is in earthly measures, it is utterly insignificant in light of the gospel and our call to follow Christ. For Christ’s sake, let us dream. Not for our own sake, not for our own glory, but for His. May we no longer be satisfied with our dreams of life, our definitions of success. May we be willing to follow the radical, life-changing, all-consuming plan He has for us.

            It is terrifying, but it is so worth it. His life is so worth it. His dreams are so much greater than our own. For Christ’s sake, let us dream. I thought I was consumed by a dream to write. And truly, I am. I dream of writing, of winning a Pulitzer prize, of greatness. I dream of writing words that will transform, that will take hold of those who read them and never let them go, never let them be the same.

            For Christ’s sake. Not for my own glory, not for my own fulfillment, but for the advancement of His kingdom, His name, His truth. His dreams for me are so far beyond my own. It will be terrifying, it will mean more sacrifice than I can imagine. But it will mean more joy than I can ever imagine.

            It is a terrifying thing to consider what it actually means to follow Christ, but it is also the greatest adventure we will ever encounter. We all long for adventure. We thirst for it. We need it. Well, here it is. Are you willing to trade your own adventure, your own dreams for His? Knowing that His dreams, His plan, will lead you to be more of yourself than you could ever imagine? That His dreams for you are more perfectly suited for everything inside of you than you could ever imagine?

            That doesn’t sound so terrifying, does it? Falling into the arms of Christ and resting there? Trusting Him through every moment, every day, every experience. Living with His Spirit, His power within you? Resting in His love? It is beyond our imagining. We have simply forgotten how to dream, how to long for what Christ has for us. We have been taught to settle.

            Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead and Christ will shine on you. For Christ’s sake, let us dream dreams beyond our wildest imaginings.